Peach Blossom Pavilion. Mingmei Yip

the cover: The Art of Love, written by someone calling himself Master Dong Xuanzi, meaning Mysterious Hole. The Art of Love, by Mysterious Hole, I kept savouring the strange syllables in my mouth, as if by so doing I’d be enlightened to the profoundest mystery of the wind and moon domain.

      But now my mind felt like a clear sky ambushed by dark clouds.

      I felt blood coursing inside me. My face was hot and my mouth dry. I grabbed the books and ran all the way to Pearl’s room, only to find it empty. I hurried here and there but couldn’t catch a glimpse of her shadow, nor a whiff of her perfume. In the corridor leading to the garden, I was still thinking of all the strange things I’d just read when suddenly I bumped into soft flesh. I looked up and caught Fang Rong’s ominous gaze.

      ‘Xiang Xiang!’ she chided. ‘Where were you? I’ve been looking for you all over. Come!’ She led me back to my room, shoved me in, and slammed shut the door.

      ‘Have you studied the books and the classic?’ she asked in a heated whisper.

      I chuckled. ‘Mama, there are only five classics, the Spring and Autumn Annals, the Book of Songs, the Book of Changes, the—’

      ‘All right, enough. Stop that silly bragging of yours! And wipe that complacent smile off your face! You know what? I don’t care about the Book of Changes, I only care if my daughters can bring me lots of change! You understand?’

      ‘But Mama, how can one bring in money by reading The Plain Girl’s Classic?’

      Now Fang Rong searched me, her eyes darting around like shooting marbles. ‘Ha ha, Xiang Xiang, you are, after all, not as smart as you look!’ Then she leant toward me and lowered her voice, as if to confide in me the deepest secret of the universe. ‘You know what’s the most precious thing about you?’

      ‘My talent in the arts.’ I wanted to add ‘and my beauty’ but decided to be modest.

      Mama winked. ‘No! Your virginity, silly girl.’ She cast me a penetrating look. ‘Xiang Xiang, you’ve never been touched by a man, have you?’

      ‘Yes, I have.’

      Now Fang Rong’s small eyes suddenly rounded into two fireballs. She gripped my blouse, choking me. ‘You little whore, who?’

      ‘My baba.’

      ‘Oh damn!’ She let go of me, then wielded an accusing finger. ‘You wicked slut, you fucked your own father!’ Now her voice cracked like thunder. ‘When you slept with him, did he touch your golden gate? Did he insert his jade stalk into your cinnabar crevice?’

      ‘Mama, I was just about to ask you all about golden gate and cinnabar crevice and …’

      All the tensed muscles on Mama’s face seemed to relax. ‘But you told me your father slept with you, so you’re sure he didn’t do anything to you?’

      ‘Of course he did. He pulled the blanket for me. He told me stories—’

      ‘Ha! That’s all he did to you?’

      ‘Yes. When I was little, I was so frightened of ghosts that I cried and cried unless Baba came and slept with me.’

      ‘Where was your mother?’

      ‘She went to work.’

      ‘At night? So she was a whore like you?’

      ‘No! It was right after Baba had broken his leg.’ I blushed, stuttering, ‘She had to work as a … a … night fragrance collector to pay for his hospital bills.’

      Mama flung back her fat head and roared into such delirious laughter that it seemed as if all her laugh meridians had been suddenly struck open by lightning. ‘Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Xiang Xiang, you scared the pee out of me by telling how your father slept with you while your mother collected shit!’

      I felt so angry and humiliated that I couldn’t utter a word.

      Now she kept laughing like a lunatic chased by a drunk. Waiting until she’d finally calmed down, I changed the subject. ‘Mama, you still haven’t told me what is jade stalk, golden gate—’

      ‘You have no idea what these mean? But hasn’t Pearl explained all this to you a long time ago?’

      ‘No.’

      Mama widened her eyes. ‘That bitch! She didn’t? You stupid little whore, you’ll soon have your petals opened by a man and you have no idea what a jade stalk or a golden gate is? Even if Pearl hasn’t taught you, didn’t the other sisters mention any of this to you? Eh?’

      ‘But Mama, I have no time to talk with the other sisters! I have to practice my arts the whole day every day, and do errands for you!’

      ‘All right, all right, enough of your nonsense. Anyway, you’ll soon find out.’

      ‘How?’

      ‘When you lose your virginity. Many men will be happy to pay many pieces of gold for it. When men have sex with pretty young virgins, their jade stalks will be maddeningly stirred.’ She cocked an eye at me. ‘After that, they will be rejuvenated and have great longevity. Some men get rich, while others get official posts. Even their bad luck will be reversed.’

      I said nothing; Mama went on, now smiling dreamily, ‘Big Master Fung has already won the auction to be your datou ke.’ She pointed to the mole between her brows. ‘My third eye told me a long time ago that he’d surely win.’

      ‘What auction and who’s datou ke and Big Master Fung?’

      She chuckled. ‘Ah, Xiang Xiang, you think you’re smart but you’re actually pretty stupid. Datou ke is the first man to collect qi from your yin part. These old men are desperate to collect youthful yin energy. If a man can have three hundred virgins, everything comes back – teeth, black hair, vitality.’

      ‘Wah, then I’d also like to collect some yin energy when I grow old.’

      Mama laughed, shivering the flesh on her face. ‘Sure, Xiang Xiang. That’s why from time to time some old lesbians will come to us asking for virgins.’

      ‘Lesbians?’

      Mama winked. ‘They’re called mirror-rubbing girls. Because to lose their souls, two women can only rub their mirror-flat yin parts against each other.’

      ‘Losing their soul! You mean they die?’

      ‘Xiang Xiang, I’m tired of your stupidity!’ Mama yelled, then paused to smile mischievously. ‘But I’m sure Big Master Fung won’t be tired of you.’

      ‘Who’s Big Master Fung?’

      ‘You’ve seen him at the party.’

      ‘You mean that all-wrinkled-old-and-dying?’

      ‘Xiang Xiang, watch out for your stinky mouth!’ She cast me a dirty look; her mole moved menacingly between her eyes. ‘He’s already paid a huge amount for your first night. So you better make him happy. Otherwise …’ She stamped her foot on the floor.

      Now all my hair stood up on end. I could almost feel hundreds of slimy creatures crawling all over me, to be followed by the all-wrinkled Big Master Fung.

      Mama grinned meaningfully. ‘Xiang Xiang, smart as you are, which would you prefer, a swarm of slimy rats crawling on you or only one Big Master Fung?’

      ‘One Big Master Fung, of course!’

      ‘Good girl. Behave and you’ll get what you want.’ She patted my head, then counted her pudgy fingers. ‘Nice clothes, good food, a new hairstyle, ice cream, and now Big Master Fung and his longevity wrinkles, ha! ha! ha!’

      While one minute Mama almost choked herself breathless with her lunatic laugh, the next minute she abruptly stopped, casting me a blood-curdling glance.