This compendium is a highly opinionated, occasionally bogus representation of the most egregious modern examples of both common irritating folks and the rich and powerful who demean others while enriching themselves. It also includes real villains. <br><br>See if you can tell the difference. The subjects of this book barely scratch the surface of the total number of jerks worldwide. However, they are excellent examples of those who often wallow in a putrid pool of self-aggrandizement. This effort is offered in the same loathsome spirit by equal opportunity offenders and is intended to be all in fun, but not necessarily fun for all.<br><br>"If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."<br>– Alice Roosevelt Longworth
What the HELL is the world coming to? Mayor Goodman has been assassinated. Contract killer Macheath has just married Pretty Polly Peachum and they plan to escape to a better world – but they aren’t going anywhere. Not if pickled pilchard tycoon Les Peachum and his wife have anything to do with it. See, they aren’t happy with their daughter marrying Macheath. Not one bit. Before the day is out Macheath will face the hangman’s noose and much more besides. All the while, the dogs are howling, the pier is creaking, the babes are crying, the concrete is cracking and the truth won’t stay hidden for much longer… Based on The Beggar’s Opera , John Gay’s classic musical satire, Kneehigh’s Dead Dog in a Suitcase (and other love songs) is busting with wit, wonder and weirdness. An extraordinary cast of characters shoot, hoot and shimmy their way through this twisted morality tale of our times…one that is by turns shocking, hilarious, heartfelt and absurd.
"In the most important theatrical book of this or any other decade, moderate twitter sensation @tips4actors (unrestrained by a 40-character limit) gives you all the advice you need to take your acting to the next level. How to upstage your fellow cast members; what to wear on the first day of rehearsals; and a guide to the finest places to poo in London's West End – it’s all in here! Who else would come up with such transformative advice as… ‘Never read the script. Would your character read the script? No, of course not. For them the script doesn’t exist.’ or… ‘When having sex with a casting director, show off your acting by faking orgasm.’? The answer is no one. Because no other writer is BRAVE enough to tell actors the truth."
Pictured on the cover, in his younger, more athletic years before he ventured into stand-up comedy and literally tried his hand at writing, Jon D. Webster is seen sporting the coveted green jacket awarded to all Masters Tournament winners. He was the youngest champion on record and per his request, the first in the tournament's history and quite possibly the last to celebrate his win with a Mickey Mouse balloon.
As for the content of this book, here is a sneak preview. As Shang Tsung said in Mortal Kombat. «And now for a taste of things to come.»
I'm an incurable insomniac. I like to say that sleep and I have a strained relationship. In the evening she plays hard to get and in the morning she's clingy. I actually have to take prescription sleeping pills in order to fall asleep. On my bottle of prescription sleeping pills, there is a warning label which says «May cause drowsiness.» No. It had better cause drowsiness. That's what I'm paying for.
Frequently, on the interstate, I will see signs that say «Expect potholes. Use caution.» I think they need to replace those signs with what they really want to say. They need to put up some signs which say «We really fucking don't feel like fixing the road.»
Recently, someone I know moved into a new house. When they moved in, there was a sticker on the front door which said «This property protected by angels.» Not ADT. Not a home security system. Angels. I told them I think they need to remove that sticker because nothing makes a would-be robber say «We're gonna rob this place» quicker than a sticker that says «This property protected by angels.»
Jon has written for outlets such as the Modesto Atheism Examiner, Guardian Liberty Voice, Unreal News, and Back Room Knox and has been featured on The Pink Atheist, Road to Reason, Freethought Forum, The Freethought Radio Hour, Atheist Analysis, and Reason TV. Jon has a Bachelor of Science in Theatre and Communication Arts and is working on a Masters Degree in Applied Psychology. He is the author of Nothing Sacred: An Atheist Quote-A-Day Calendar, Blasphemy: Atheist Quotes and Essays By An Apostate, Unreal News: A Collection of Satire, and 10 Decisions I Could Have Made Better Than God: And Other Audacious Atheist Articles, all of which can be purchased through Fastpencil.com.
What if someone told you that they had come up with 10 alternatives to some of God's decisions that were more efficient, caused less harm, and in general, were more loving than the 10 decisions God had supposedly made? What if you were told that you could too? In this book, that topic is covered as the author provides entertaining analysis, satire, and criticism of a so-called perfect book while making fun of religion in a way that would make even the most fervent religious zealot laugh.
As for the cover. Yes. You read that correctly. David Mills, the author of Atheist Universe said of this book «This is the greatest thing I have ever seen.» Other feedback on many other articles contained within the pages of this book include «This is gold.» «Love love love this!» “Brilliant!” “Wow… just wow!” “Thank you for that! I never thought of it that way!” “Clever.” “Very interesting!” “Wow. I have read the Bible, and never looked at it like that before.” “Very insightful!” «This is amazing. I read it like 4 times. Love at first sight.» «Oh, that is good.» “Genius!” How will you react to this book? Flip through the first few pages and see for yourself. Note: If you are viewing this book online, there should be a preview function you can use to check it out.
As far as the content is concerned, this book has everything: atheist satire (one of which is entitled Joel Osteen Hospitalized After Smiling So Big He Broke His Face), atheist poetry (including a tribute to Christopher Hitchens entitled Tonight I Drink Johnnie Walker Black), critiques of Christian films such as God's Not Dead, Left Behind, Persecuted, and Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas. Included in this work are four passages that each won first place in an atheist quote submission contest. There were around 60 competing entries total in each competition. In this book you will find interviews with prominent atheists such as Camels with Hammers' Philosopher Dr. Daniel Fincke and the founder of Global Secular Humanist Movement, Faisal Saeed Al Mutar as well as a song about the ineptitude of Ray Comfort entitled «Google that Shit!» What more could you ask for? Buy one for yourself. Buy one for a friend. Hell, buy a whole bunch and stock hotel rooms with them like the Gideons do with the Bible.
Jon is also the author of three other books as well. Nothing Sacred: An Atheist Quote-A-Day Calendar, Blasphemy: Atheist Quotes and Essays By An Apostate, and Unreal News: A Collection of Satire can be purchased through FastPencil.com. Jon has written for Guardian Liberty Voice, Unreal News Online, and wrote for four and a half years for the Modesto Atheism Examiner. He has been featured on and interviewed by The Pink Atheist, Freethought Forum, Atheist Analysis, and Reason TV. He has a Bachelor of Science in Theatre and Communication Arts and is working on a Masters Degree in Applied Psychology. Jon hopes you get as much enjoyment out of reading this book as he did writing it.
"Laughter: An Essay on the Meaning of the Comic" is Henri Bergson’s treatise on comedy. Bergson makes three essential observations about laughter and comedy. Firstly that comedy is necessarily a human thing, secondly that laughter is a cerebral thing that requires detachment from the subject in order to laugh at it, and lastly that laughter plays an important social function. This interesting examination of what makes us laugh and why is a compelling and quick read, a must for any budding comedian or any one else seeking a greater understanding of humour.
Take a little trip through the underworld of mini-mobsters… From seedy joints to the Ferret Bureau of Investigation, by way of downtown squeakeasies. And discover what happens when hamsters go bad. Crime. Love. Violence. Peanuts. Just some of the themes that spin around in this book.
Words You Don't Know takes the reader on a spirited romp through the dusty corridors of the English language. In 23 chapters and 202 pages, author Robin Bloor shines a light on nearly 300 of the least known words in the language, illuminating the history and mystery of each in short, humorous essays. He has reached back in time and selected some of the most obscure and fascinating words the reader has likely never encountered: words that span the centuries, from the time of Aristotle to the time of Google; words on the verge of extinction and words being coined right now. In each of the 23 chapters, the author weaves a theme around 10 of these words. Each humorous story is unique. The reader will discover rare words, swear words, long words, wrong words, curse words, terse words, legal words, regal words, tech words, sex words, eponyms, retronyms, nonsense words and words with limericks – even words about words! The author's sharp wit, playfulness, and British charm lend each essay a special perspective that is guaranteed to both entertain and enlighten the word lover in every reader.
“Read what you enjoy, not what bores you,” Nick Hornby tells us. That simple, liberating, and indispensable directive animates each installment of the celebrated critic and author’s monthly column in the Believer. In this delightful and never-musty tour of his reading life, Hornby tells us not just what to read, but how to read.Whether tackling a dismayingly bulky biography of Dickens while his children destroy something in the next room, or getting sucked into a serious assessment of Celine Dion during an intensely fought soccer match featuring his beloved Arsenal, or devouring an entire series of children’s books while on vacation, Hornby’s reviews are rich, witty, and occasionally madcap. These essays capture the joy and ire, the despair and exhilaration of the book-lover’s life, and will appeal equally to both monocle-wearing salonnieres and people, like him, who spend a lot of time thinking about Miley Cyrus’s next role.