An Amish Courtship. Jan Drexler

on the shine of a healthy animal. He didn’t need to be ashamed of her when he faced Bram.

      He left Tilly still basking in the sun as he went into the barn and put the brush and currycomb on their shelf with care. One thing he remembered from Grossdawdi’s barn was how clean and orderly everything had been. Each step he took in that direction was progress.

      The old buggy stood in the middle of the barn floor, still clean from yesterday’s washing. The wheels were worn, and should be replaced. The seats needed to be recovered, but the old blankets he had thrown over them would have to do for now. Even with as many years as the buggy had been around, though, the black lacquered oilcloth cover gleamed in the subdued light of the barn. Everything was ready for today’s trip.

      Samuel took off his new hat and ran his fingers through his hair. Everything was ready except him. The thought of seeing Annie again filled his stomach with something like a bundle of puppies, but Bram...

      He whooshed out a breath at the thought of his last encounter with Bram at the barn raising last summer. He had been stupid, making idle threats that didn’t mean anything, but Bram had responded like no Amishman ever did. He had drawn him close, like a brother would, but his grip had been hard on Samuel’s shoulder, and his words dripped of danger. Samuel swallowed at the memory. He had never encountered anything like the tone in Bram’s voice. The years his brother had spent working for gangsters in Chicago had hardened him.

      Bram could be a dangerous man, but his life had changed since that hot day last summer. He had joined the church, married a pretty widow and was now a father to her three children. Was he any less threatening, though?

      Samuel ran his hand through his hair again, making it stand up in spikes. He didn’t have long to wait to find out. He planned to take the girls and Sadie to Annie’s, where he would apologize to her and her husband. The puppies churned. That would be difficult enough. But then, once he learned where Bram lived, he would go to his farm and...what? Confront him? Try to make amends? Repair the broken places between them? It all depended on Bram’s reaction.

      He took a cloth and wiped a few stray specks of dust from the buggy, then led Tilly into the barn to harness her. Every clomp of her hooves on the wooden floor was one step closer to facing Bram. He tied Tilly to a post and stroked her neck.

      “Well, Tilly-girl, it’s going to be a day to remember.”

      Taking the harness from the hooks on the wall, he swung it onto the mare’s back. She stepped away, but then stood quietly as he murmured to her. “So, Tilly, so. You know we’re going for a drive, don’t you?” Her ears swung back and then forward at the unfamiliar tone in his voice. He reached under her to grab a strap, and as he fastened the harness onto her, he kept talking. “We’re going down to Eden Township today.” He patted her rump as he walked around to her other side. “You’ll like the drive. New places to see.” Once the harness was on, he led her to the buggy and backed her into place between the shafts.

      After she was hitched up, he led her out of the barn to the hitching rail next to the house. Esther was waiting for him on the steps, bouncing on her toes and grinning. He had to smile at her.

      “You look like you’re ready to go.”

      “For sure I am!” She ran down the walk toward the buggy. “I haven’t seen Annie since she got married.” She stopped when she reached him and looked into his face, suddenly sober. “You don’t think she has forgotten us, do you?”

      The litter of puppies in Samuel’s stomach clambered over each other as Esther’s words sunk in. He had been so concerned with his own meeting with Annie that he hadn’t considered how Esther and Judith must be feeling. They were her sisters, separated from her through no fault of their own.

      “I’m sorry.” The words came out garbled, strangled by his swelling throat. As Judith joined them, he put a hand on each of his sister’s shoulders and tried again. “I’m sorry that I haven’t taken you to see Annie before.”

      Judith and Esther glanced at each other.

      “We understand,” Esther said. “You were angry—”

      Samuel cut off her excuses. “But I shouldn’t have been. I shouldn’t have acted like I did when she wanted to marry that young man.”

      “Matthew.”

      Samuel squeezed Judith’s shoulder in silent thanks for providing the name he couldn’t remember. The name he had blocked. “Matthew.” He nodded. “Matthew.” The serious young man who had claimed their Annie. The puppies wouldn’t settle down.

      Judith shrugged his hand off her shoulder. “Can we go now? I can’t wait to get there.”

      Samuel stroked Tilly’s nose as the girls climbed into the buggy, ignoring their surprise at the changes he had made. He didn’t have to go with them. He could send them over to Sadie’s to ride with her. He didn’t have to face Annie and Matthew. He could stay home. There was plenty of work to keep him busy.

      He swallowed. He didn’t have to risk Bram’s rejection.

      Tilly nibbled at his shoulder. It was the first sign of affection she had ever shown him. He patted her cheek and smoothed the hair under her bridle.

      “Well, Tilly-girl, I guess it’s time to face the lions.”

      He climbed into the buggy and lifted the reins. The girls chattered to each other in the back seat, talking about Annie and her baby. He rubbed at his freshly shaved chin as they talked. He hadn’t thought that Annie would have a child. His nephew, from what the girls were saying.

      Turning Tilly onto the road, he urged her into the quick trot she liked as they headed toward Sadie’s house. As they turned in, he saw Sadie and Ida Mae waiting for them at the edge of the drive. The churning in his stomach eased as Mary stepped out of the house and joined them just as he drew the buggy up. She gave him one of her quiet smiles as Ida Mae climbed into the back of the buggy. He stepped out to help Sadie into the front seat.

      “Good morning, Samuel.” She clung to his hand as she put one foot on the buggy step. “It’s a fine day for a drive.”

      “Ja, for sure.”

      He waited for her to move to the center of the seat so that Mary would be able to sit next to her, but Sadie waved him away.

      “I’d like to sit here, if you don’t mind. Mary can sit in the center, between us.”

      Mary shot a look toward her aunt, then walked around the back of the buggy with Samuel.

      “You know why Sadie wants me to sit in the middle, don’t you?” Mary whispered the words.

      “Why?”

      Mary stopped, out of sight of the others. “I think she’s trying to push us together.”

      Samuel stared. Her cheeks were pink, and one wisp of hair curled around the edge of her bonnet, sending his thoughts down a path that led to tucking that wisp behind her ear. He gripped his suspenders to keep his hands still. “You mean like a matchmaker?”

      “Shh.” Mary turned away from the buggy. “Don’t let her hear you.” She twisted her fingers together. “If she sees that she isn’t successful, then she’ll give up. We just have to ignore her attempts to match us up.”

      “That sounds good to me.”

      Mary continued around the buggy to climb into the front seat and Samuel followed her. His plans didn’t include a wife, and he should be glad that Mary had rejected the idea of the two of them making a match. So why did he feel like he had just watched something precious float away?