A Family break up after 37 years of marriage. El Kay Mawkin

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Название A Family break up after 37 years of marriage
Автор произведения El Kay Mawkin
Жанр Секс и семейная психология
Серия
Издательство Секс и семейная психология
Год выпуска 0
isbn 9781925880618



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made my daughter quite sad and more introvert and she lost all interest in pursuing mathematics .She could have gone for her PhD at Delhi Unibersity or followed some other course in her life .

      Here I had a realisation but much later in my life .

      I didn't perform the role of a good friend to my daughter , by boosting her self esteem , which was going down in her abysmally low .

      My son had passed out his class XII exam with a great difficulty .He had no love for tight schedule of school and college education , which bored him to hell .

      I did help him to clear his class X exams , when I was jobless and he passed out with flying colours .

      But after we shifted to Gurgaon and I got busy with my own job,he started slipping again in his studies .

      We put him in a local school at Gurgaon and I helped him with his compartment examination in Physics , so that he cleared his final class XII Board examination .

      A bright young boy ,who was interested in astronomy and so many other fields of learning in life, but sitting tight and cramming the subjects were not his cup of tea .

      As a father I was often worried about my son’s education .( But consoled myself that even Einstein and our great Guru Rabindranath Tagore also hated going to their schools , but both of them became nobel laureates in their own fields,later on in their lives . )

      As parents , we wanted our son to do graduation, even by a long distance education which would help him in his life all through , anywhere in the world .

      But ,despite my taking leave from my office to teach him ,it just didn't work .

      Destiny had something else in store for him and he was to become a successful professional musician in his life later on ,

      He was struggling to find his way out of the mad race ,after finishing his class XII exam .

      He started pursuing music, by learning acoustic guitar by himself or with the help of a computer and singing at a local restaurant.He used to sing at the small balcony outside our flat or go upstairs on the rooftop to sing freely and loudly .

      As a father ,I started feeling that he needed a better vocal training and we got him a South Korean teacher ,an opera singer and a conductor . This teacher taught him for almost for two years and after that he left for South Korea,He did a good work on my son’s voice and I did see visible improvements in my son's voice control .

      He had borrowed a good baritone voice from me and his grandfather but didn't posses the range of higher notes which myself and my father had .

      His teacher used to be a conductor in city minstrels( -a choir group who would sing Christian hymns on Easter or on other events and the choir consisting of volunteers of all age groups ) and my son became a part of this choir .

      As parents we always attended his shows at the local church or at an auditorium ,

      For western music , there were hardly any institutions for learning Western music , one could learn at Delhi School of Music or practicing on one's own .

      He did join a newly opened school of music by Rai foundation at Delhi and my son had his own motorcycle to travel now .But this music school closed down after a few months .

      My son learnt music with the help of his computer and his own patience and passion for music .

      I always wished I had known earlier that my son wanted to pursue western music and I would have got him a good teacher early on in his student days .

      As children my son and my daughter used to learn Indian classical music with a private tutor , after their school .My daughter completed her diploma for three years but my son left it in between .

      Later on I realised his interests lied more towards learning musical instruments especially in western music .

      Music has always been a part and parcel of our family genealogy .My father had a good deep baritone voice and he used to sing for pleasure .I used to sing Light music on stage till my university days but we never thought of making it our profession .

      Entertainment industry had started coming up in India during 2000's ,opening several avenues for young performers .Parents had also changed their old mindset about entertainment industry .

      My son got admission in Berklee college of music at Boston in USA but annual fees was Rs 20 lakh per annum .This college was quite renowned ,not only in America but the world over for Contemporary western music and many other areas of western music .

      Now the value of my flat had gone up and I decided to sell my flat to send my son by paying his first year fees.

      The entire graduation course was for five years .

      My friends from USA used to tell me that I needed to pay only once for my son’s ‘first semester and the rest my son would generate himself .

      This did not happen since my son was not allowed to work at the college part time or outside for two years of his study course .

      Me and my wife completed 25 years of our marriage in this house and celebrated our silver wedding anniversary with our close relatives and friends .We did a Havan by Arya samaj priest who was to do this Havan for our family on all our future wedding anniversaries for many years till he died in 2016 and as a family we also separated in 2016 .

      We got together with our close relatives at our home ,pushing furniture aside and kept a steel Havan kund in the middle of the hall and a fire was lighted with the help of special woods and Havan Samagri .Arya samaj Havan basically thanks god for one's health ,Nostrils ,knees and eyes , water and Fire ,the two most essential elements of our life .

      In India, we have many religious groups and sub groups .Major ones are Sanatan Dharma which has many temples with a lot of idols inside for doing prayers .

      Sikhs have their own temples called Gurudwaras .

      Muslims always pray in the mosques .

      With the coming of Britishers, India , now , had a lot of Catholic , Protestant and other sect churches in India .

      Arya samaj was developed by swamy Dayanand Saraswati during 1800’s to rid Hindus of superstitions and idol worship and focused on our ancient Vedas . Arya Samaj usually performs Havana to cleanse the air within a home and pray to Fire by chanting Sanskrit mantras .

      Similarly Brahmo samaj was developed in eastern India to get rid of superstitions and idol worship among Hindus .

      The land of India is full of gurus ( teachers ) of al shades and hues with a large following by poor people .Many of such gurus have exploited their followers and are lodged in jails for raping young girls .

      A lot of foreigners get attracted to them quite often .

      Beatle group and Steve jobs were some who came to India in search of peace .

      When Muslims came to India,a lot of poor people became Muslims fin order to avoid taxes .

      When Britishers came to India ,these poor people became Christians to gain acceptability in an otherwise caste ridden society of India, which looked down upon the lower castes like cobblers ,carpenters and sweepers .

      Most of them had adopted Buddhism to gain acceptance to the social circles in India .

      My mother in law developed breast cancer at her home at Ambala during 2005 .

      We brought her to Delhi and showed her to the best of doctors but her cancer had spread badly on her breast .

      We ran around to get her radiotherapy treatment but unfortunately ,she had a terrible fall and fractured her hips .

      We consulted orthoPaedic surgeons but she expired .

      We performed all her last rites at our flat during January 2006 and sold our flat in March 2006 to send our son to USA .