Confession of a Toastmaster. Vladimir Shatakishvili

our heroes did not meet each other there.

      But in 1968, they were both sent to the Vladimir region, and upon arrival to the destination place (for him – the health department, for her – the sectoral department) they were asked to choose almost any of the handful of cities – Suzdal, Murom, Kovrov, etc. But both somehow indicated on the map the same town of Kolchugino, as they then both said, due to the maximum proximity and direct communication with Moscow. Well, after that, everything was predetermined – two «young professionals», and both from the same region, could not fail to meet in the town, where everybody knew everyone and everything. They met, looked at each other, and agreed to be together: – «We are together, back to back against the world» and promise each other to be together «till death do us part». They still keep their promises.

      And I am going to oppose to such a clever and famous man in this story. However, I am lucky to be well informed of the subject matter (see the title), and while my senior colleague and his wife have spent just a couple of days in the world capital of beer, then Your humble servant can now safely lead tours around the glorious city of Munich due to my six trips there (only two or three lasted for a week, others lasted for two weeks). And I am going to argue only about the quality of the German beer. The rest of the story, written, incidentally, at my request, is great. What a graceful and masterful command of the language the author has. How easily and naturally the reader finds himself/herself on the streets and squares of the Caucasian Mineralnye Vody and Stavropol, beloved by their citizens. There are no enough words to tell that our big country experienced the same problems back then – the quality of beer, and its presence or absence in the sale.

      I suggest going to Munich of the present day. And in order not to be like Krylov's Moska, «barking at the elephant», I will try to tell the reader about the German beer, its quality, centuries-old traditions, and hospitality.

      The capital of Bavaria, Munich, is one of the most beautiful cities in Europe, situated on the South-East of Germany, very close to Austria, Italy and Switzerland. A city with a population of 1.6 million inhabitants is the third largest one in the country after Berlin and Hamburg. Gorgeous, rich, expensive, comfortable, open, and tolerant, great for vacation – all of these characteristics of the Bavarian capital really fit it. For many years, Munich has been the most economically developed and stable city of Germany, as well as one of the richest cities in Europe. Its luxury hotels, shopping malls, and elegant restaurants are worthy of the most discerning visitors. And immense cultural heritage can be fully appreciated only by connoisseurs. The city is great not only in size and global connections but also in its sights, coziness, and kindness. In the held of communication and advertising, Munich is considered to be, respectively, the second city in the world after New York. Truly fabulous surroundings really beautify the life in it. In the weekend, the countless number of tourists go to the south, to the wonderful lakes of the Alpine foothills, to the paradise for tourists and skiers. The city is famous for its stunning architecture, unique buildings and structures, famous museums, modern stadium and unique parks. Its monuments, fountains, squares and streets are so grandiose and significant that tourists and visitors are simply captured by this luxury and grandeur. If we speak the high-sounding language, the life in Munich is based on three pillars: cars, football, and beer. The prestigious brand BMW is known worldwide. Its headquarters and its museum are the most interesting and beautiful buildings of this modern and beautiful city. I have found something for connoisseurs since I have mentioned them in this story. It was in Munich where electricity was first used in the world: a landmark event occurred in 1882 due to an ordinary engineer Mizbah Oskar von Miller. A little later, on the eve of the coming XX century, the Bavarian capital became a place, where for the first time in the world, having passed examinations on driving the car, the motorist-amateur received the world's first driver's license in addition to the world's first identification number for the car. Lovers of technology can find out about this and many other things in the Museum of BMW, built in 1973.

      For FIFA World Cup 2006 it was decided to build a modern stadium, equipped with the latest equipment. The people of the city even had to pass a resolution about the new construction, but now they are proud of the «Alliance-Arena», the place of home games of one of the most popular clubs in Europe: Bayern Munich and TSV Munich 1860. Architectural Studio Herzog & de Meuron created the world's largest (also for connoisseurs) membrane covering, comprised of 2760 diamond-shaped pillows. During the day it shines white, and at night it is highlighted in different colours. The most modern stadium of Europe accepts 69 thousand fans and is one of the most visited tourist sites of the city. According to the words of my son Aleksandr, the Spanish city of Valencia, where he had been studying for three years at the Tennis Academy of Pancho Alvarino, was going to build an ultramodern stadium that would exceed some indicators of the one in Munich… I had to call to Valencia, to the long-time residents there, our friends from Pyatigorsk – Ruben and Lyudmila Saribekyan. They confirmed that the stadium is being built. Moreover, it will be a real masterpiece, but due to the financial and economic crisis, its construction will end in 2013. It is called Nuevo Mestalla. Its architect is Javier Iribarren.

      Having come to this place, I read again the work of Zvyagintsev, because my disagreements with him begin in the world's most famous beer hall Hofbräuhaus. My friends from Stavropol did not like beer and sausages. I am sure that this is some kind of accident, although, among my twenty visits to this historic place, there was one episode when I did not like beer too. This passage can be explained by the language barrier when the waiter of no titular nationality mixes varieties of a large assortment of beer and serves some beer with unusual supplement or lemonade.

      In support of this version, I dare to agree on some kind of gamble: having decided to write a book about alcohol that would turn into two volumes, I would still face the description of my beer adventures in Munich, and I would have to stand up for the quality of the worldwide brand.

      So, we had an idea to publish the menu of this place to the delight of the readers. Some of my friends have imperceptibly borrowed it and have given it to me as a reminder of the wonderful feasts and original manuals for the author, writing on these topics. I am sure that no writer, even a very talented one, does not have the information contained on multiple pages of this menu. As for the reader, he/she will be able to plunge into the oasis of gastronomic madness, at the same time, of purely informative purposes, will get acquainted with four centuries of history of the famous beer.

      My first trip to Germany was in the summer of 2005. By that time, our old friends had been living in Munich for many years: Irina Sergeeva (we studied together in the Pyatigorsk Institute of Foreign Languages) with her family – her husband Murad Yagazarov, her mother Alyona Grigorievna, her daughter Mariana, and her son-in-law Ivan Milevsky. Three months before that first trip, I sat on the «Kremlin diet», published in Komsomolskaya Pravda. Due to Katya Malik, the journalist of this popular and beloved newspaper, I met some of her friends from Komsomolskaya Pravda, one of which was a methodist for the use of this diet. Some of their tips helped me and I lost 13 kilograms in less than three months. After the release of my first book «Box of Colourful Contemporaries» in 2004, Katya published a great article in Komsomolskaya Pravda (No. 48 of March 23, 2005), where three pages (1, 6, 7) were devoted to the interview with me and my, now late, friend Andrey Azatovich Gedikyants, under whose leadership, thanks to the help of Volodya Tyurin, the future oligarch Roman Abramovich began his career in big business. Katya died on January 13, 2006, in the hospital № 1 of the city of Pyatigorsk. She was young (29 years old), beautiful, and brave (constant trips to the war zone in Chechnya). She lacked only a few meters to walk to the doctor, and fell somewhere in the territory of our city hospital, not recovering. In memory of the fallen journalists, the concern «Sovershenno Sekretno» often holds the «roll call of remembrance», where, along with the names of the dead in recent years journalists: Artyom Borovik and his colleagues, there is the name of the modest young girl Katya Malik, who feared nothing and always spoke the truth, who gave life to the fight for justice… May the memory of her live forever.

      So, I flew to Germany, being slender and emaciated, and during that week of the German «beautiful life» I gained 8 more kilograms. Well, how can one resist such temptations? Where can one find the strength not to try all the goodies offered in the above menu? All my visits to the «beer kingdom of Munich» began and ended in Hofbräuhaus…

      It is recommended for adherents of various diets to avoid